i have your letter here in front of me now

You wrote it on Sunday the 15th

and mailed it the next day

probably before noon


Your words sound good out loud


i was alone

so i grabbed some scrap paper I had lying around

mostly job opportunities from the postings board

at the employment centre

i used four of the pages and wrote in black

i told you i never got a job just yet but i was looking

and felt hopeful

i told you my band was almost finished recording our first

album and could be ready within three weeks

i thanked you for sending the photographs of your most

recent oil paintings and i apologized for not sending any

in return

the reason being

i did not make any new paintings in the last eight months

due to a serious shortage of supplies

lack of funds

and the skill to get the art thing back up and running

but i did say that all was not lost

and i wouldn't be starving to death in the near future


i can't remember what else i said but at the end i wrote:

i will see you soon

Your friend and brother in arms: Freezing Moon Crow

and i drew a small picture of a man standing alone

his eyes were big and clear

and the spirits of ravens and crows were all around him

his eyes were facing east

i didn't use any colours

but i knew

you would know

the sky was red and the sun was setting

and the day had been lovely

in autumn

and you and i know

the man knows everything

but has problems understanding


i wrapped it up and addressed it:

Linc the Wizard Boy, Parry Sound, Ontario


That was on Thursday


Yesterday, Monday morning, i walked downtown

heading for the post office

and when i got to the main intersection

waiting for the ligths to change

in sirens and horns


roving eyes with strange and curious racist thoughts

i realized i forgot the letter on the couch

and cursed myself for being so stupid

i thought while I'm down here

i might as well go to the employment centre anyway

which i did and i also bought my lotto tickets

went home for lunch


After lunch i grabbed your letter and walked

back downtown and cursed the main intersection again

with all the folks looking at a long-haired unemployed

Indian boy

with dark lenses covering his eyes

went into the post office

dropped the letter into the box

that was around 1:30 in the afternoon


You died last night in your bed in Parry Sound.

Thank God your mom and dad and brother were there

when you crossed over boy upside down

Your mom called me this morning and told me you were asleep

when you crossed over

She said she knew you had written me a letter last week

She said your's and my friendship was important to you

Your mother was crying


Tomorrow, i will come down to Parry Sound

to see you one last time, my friend and brother in arms

i never told you anything that i should have

i know nothing

and you understand


My friend. June 24, '97

Copyright © 2001 Mark Seabrook